so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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