Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize