We won't sleep together?
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
