yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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