I got chris browned last night
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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