I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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