so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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