you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
