honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
