He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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