still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
