I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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