She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
