Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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