I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
