oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
