Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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