Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
She's the barista slut.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize