Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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