The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
