Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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