don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
