I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Shame is for Republicans.
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