He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
