Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
she told me i tasted like america
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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