I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize