Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
