you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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