I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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