Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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