you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize