this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
