Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
