how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
We smell like vodka and hangover
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