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• (352): View more from Florida

  Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (530): View more from California

  He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.

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