sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
