Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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