trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize