Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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