I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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