Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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