i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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