I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I don't think brook has ever known best
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
