All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Alive.
So much puke
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
