i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
