i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
