How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
And then he peed in my hair
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
