yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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