i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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