# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize