why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
